Integrity Matters


1: firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values INCORRUPTIBILITY 2: an unimpaired condition SOUNDNESS3: the quality or state of being complete or undivided COMPLETENESS (Merriam-Webster)

Lack of integrity negates trust!

Yep! Only you know your own, personal “standards” and only you can preserve these personal sacraments.

Similarly, only YOU have the power to Honor these promises to yourself . . . or not.

When you compromise your personal standards, you break trust with yourself.

Trust is slow to earn and fast to disintegrate.

No one is exempt from these realities.

We tumble through life making choices.

While some folks might argue that their transgressions from the “standard” were accidental – that they un(sub)consciously erred.

I don’t allow this leniency . . . for the violation of a break in personal integrity.

If you cannot trust yourself, who CAN you trust?





You’re driving your life, so DRIVE!

Who are you anyway?

It’s exhausting to live the life of someone you are not!

Yet, many of us do this for the purpose of “furthering a career” or “keeping up with the Joneses” or to “belong” to a group hoping to gain fame and fortune by osmosis.

Guess what?

I believe you already have everything you need to be famous and worthy. This was “baked into you” upon conception.

Of course, you’ve honed yourself through the years based on on your accumulation of experiences and relationships, but you’ve never changed who you are at your core, and we love the REAL you more than any doppleganger. Even the most exact doppleganger is different than the original at the core.

So . . . If you find yourself anxious, tense, overwhelmed, tired, confused, scared, bored or any number of energy depleting emotions, I hereby prescibe the following medicane. As with any ailment, it’s not sufficient only to take your medicine . . . you must also participate in the healing process with a resolute intention to unravel the twisted web of Jungian learning that is smothering the real you.

I believe the most effective antidote is a solid course of taking a “Personality Test” and reserve at least 1/2 a day to “unpack” the results. My personal favorite test in the DISC. is a free test. While it’ll give you an amazing boost of confidence by helping you discover who you are, I recommend paying the $59 for the full report. This report offers great wisdom to guide you towards your authenteic self AND to help you understand other people and how they tick. Armed with this knowledge, I am certain you find more inner peace.

There are many other personality tests enneagram, strengthsfinder, myers brigg . . . Pick your poison 🙂

We want you to do this for yourself, because we want you to be the best you can be. As you shift to own, personal way, we all gain from your useful engagement because, every day, you will become less anxious, tense, overwhelmed, tired, confused, scared, bored or any number of energy depleting emotions.

Now GO!


Be Happy!


Negotiate with Integrity and Respect

We Realtors rely on each other to successfully sell and close home sales.

Our “jobs” are multifaceted, and I sometimes think that some Agents and Principal Brokers lose proper perspective – They develop amnesia – lose sight of the forest for the trees.

We confuse the difference of winning battles vs the war.

We forget that we CAN “pick our battles” . . . We can choose which bones to pick!

We can, with vigor, negotiate in good faith to “win” for our home buying/selling clients with civility and respect.

We can do this without petty squabbles which invariable have the same deliverables as rocking in a rocking chair . . . It keeps you moving but doesn’t get you anywhere useful.

Throughout my 27 year career as Real Estate Sales Professional, Principal Broker, and owner of Pareto Realty, I’ve literally shepherded thousands of clients and agents through difficult scenarios during this very important and complex process. As I look back on all these skirmishes, there’s ONE ingredient in the brew of EVERY one . . . a failure to communicate effectively.

Don’t forget why we’re in this negotiation!

Y’see? There’s this person or family who LOVES this house SO much they are willing to promise to buy it by signing a Purchase and Sale Agreement thereby committing to being “distracted” for 3-6 weeks accompanied by multiple SURPRISES along the way, and the tension that the stake is one of epic proportions. The emotional investment of buying a home is gargantuan.

Meanwhile, this seller or family is moving on from this home to a home that better fits a new lifestyle precipitated by any number of reasons all of which represent a vastly disheveled living scenario. Uncertainty is abound. “Will we be able to sell this house WHEN we need to move at a price that provides the equity they need in order to accomplish their mission.

These Buyers and Sellers are COMMITTED to this process.

As Realtors, our role is to “manage” (quarterback) no fewer than 42 people to complete the sale – Inspectors, appraiser, contractors, Lenders, Mortgage Lenders, Title companies.

We Realtors are the “keepers” of smooth communication.

That’s right!

The reality is that the ONE thing that can blow apart any real estate deal is . . . Lack of effective communication.

Interestingly, this principle translates universally in all collaborative pursuits.

Better than sliced bread

@ 3:30 this morning, the dogs and I heard a tree breaking in the woods above the house, but there was no “THUD” of tree hitting the ground – A little unsettling. This is one of those “waiting for the other shoe drop” scenarios . . . and a feeling that we all are experiencing day in and day out as we navigate these “remarkably unusual” times.
How are you coping with all of this uncertainty?

When will that tree fall . . . in what direction . . . and is the house in danger?

My Facebook feed is very full of emotions as waves and tides shift unpredictably.

We could go the way of obsessing and worrying and allowing all of this to consume our very being . . . or we could decide to adapt and focus on anything and everything that shows up in the realm of creative solutions.

I choose to pay just enough attention to the news to have a “comfortable” understanding of the current status.

Let’s create and anticipate and love and laugh.

Let’s spread the word of exceptional happenings!

Here’s a fine example:

Saturday, My daughter Allison’s IRL (In real life) graduation happened:

It was so awesome.

Saint Cecilia Academy really did an AMAZING job of pulling off a very special, socially distanced ceremony. They installed a stage on the lawn. Each graduate’s family was allowed to bring a car-load of humans. Upon arrival at the Driveway entrance, all cars were directed to a “Staging Parking Lot” behind the school. Each family “drew a card” with a number (we got #15) and were guided to their designated spot. When all spaces were filled, we were in order and they had all of the families drive across the lawn to create an “Amphitheatre” facing the stage. They then broadcast the whole thing on Facebook live. The graduates were seated on either side of the stage in chairs with 6′ “Social Distance” and were able to walk across the stage to receive their diplomas. Just Wonderful – The ceremony was amazing.

Don’t ever underestimate the power of good/God!

Below is a link to the whole Facebook Live event – It’s long (1:45), so not likely you’ll watch the whole thing, but you can definitely feel the warmth palpably within a few minutes . . . I get goosebumps just remembering the experience. So . . . When it was over, I heard several folks mentioning that this was actually “better” than the “normal” ceremony.

Perspective (frame of mind) are significantly important, aren’t they?

St. Cecilia Academy Graduation 2020

Posted by St. Cecilia Academy on Saturday, July 11, 2020

Confidence is Sexy

Believe in yourself!

We need you to do this because we know your potential is powerful.

Go ahead – Flex those muscles and flaunt what you have in service to yourself and everyone lucky enough to cross your path and travel with you even if only for a little while.

You choose your influence in the world – Will it be constructive and supportive?

When you claim your personal power, your confidence builds . . . and you become more willing to stick your neck out – to do good in the world with a fighter pilot spunk such that your mere presence improves for anyone and everyone within your “bubble” . . . and as you model this, others watch and learn . . . every moment and interaction magically becomes better than before.

This is the stuff that breeds charisma which is oh-so-attractive and even (dare I say) INFECTIOUS.


Below is your alma mater!

Our Deepest Fear

By Marianne Williamson

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. 

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. 

It is our light, not our darkness

That most frightens us.

We ask ourselves

Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be? 

You are a child of God.

Your playing small 

Does not serve the world. 

There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking 

So that other people won’t feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine, 

As children do. 

We were born to make manifest 

The glory of God that is within us.

It’s not just in some of us; 

It’s in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, 

We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. 

As we’re liberated from our own fear, 

Our presence automatically liberates others.