What do we know about this person?

As Principal Broker of Pareto Realty, I am quintessentially available to the most importance people in my Real Estate Business world – The Vital Few REALTORS of Pareto Realty.

Every day, I have many opportunities (I get to do this – not “I HAVE to do this”) to help Agents work through myriad transactional issues. These are IMPORTANT issues relating to IMPORTANT transactions, and favorable outcomes are IMPORTANT to the most IMPORTANT people in our business world – Our Home Buying and selling Clients.

The foundation of our culture at Pareto Realty is, and has always been, that as each of us succeeds, so do we all, and the real winners are our clients.

I approach every one of these issues with curiosity, so I ask LOTS of questions. I want to know the Who – What – When – Where – Why of the scenario before we consider the How . . . How we will address this complicated and important issue.

Most of these conversations begin with the agent very passionately regurgitating the “What is happening?” . . . THIS is the naming of the “problem” . . . Once named, we can then clarify other important details like the timeline of events from the beginning until now (The When) and the Where (Where are the clients buying or selling?). Those are the “Details” and they only describe the chain of happenings that got us where we are now.

Invariably, the MOST important factor to finding resolution centers around the WHO. Of course, I know my agents well, so I already know their unique disposition, way of communicating, preferred mode of communication (Text, Phone, etc)n and personality profile (DISC).

I ask who this other agent is? This is a quick check-in because having been in this business for over 25 years I know a LOT of agents. If it is an agent I already know well, we can often solve the problem simply by my realizing that what we have is a “clash of dissonant personalities” . . . I can then coach the agent to adjust the style of communication such that a Spirit of cooperation can emerge.

If I’ve never heard of (or know well) the agent, we do some quick research to see what we can learn that might help us find our way.

How long has the agent been licensed?

What is this agent’s Company Affiliation?

What is this agent’s experience?

How many houses (Selling and Listing) and where ( Are they in their “Comfort Zone” in terms of area of expertise?

Often, these questions lead to a win-win strategy to lead all parties to successful resolution.

There are other “Whos” to consider . . . What can we learn about the Buyers and Sellers that might help things?

What are their respective motivations – their WHYs for being where we are (Buying and Selling THIS house)?

Invariably the “HOW” suddenly becomes clear somewhere along this line inquiry at which point we implement the winning strategy.

In my experience, most all issues boil down to failure to communication effectively.

Slow down and practice this “What – Where – When – Who” adventure and enjoy getting HOW faster.

Smiles all around!

Your Process Serves everyone

The best professionals have a process for everything they do.

Airline pilots, re-fuelers, mechanics, and flight attendants diligently and precisely follow the same pre-flight checklist prior to EVERY flight. We all depend on them doing this thoroughly because the stakes are very high. If they get sloppy, we all might perish.

Same goes for Surgeons and Attorneys and Mortgage Loan Officers and REALTORS and auto mechanics . . . Well . . . and virtually anyone and everyone whose job is to serve others.

In every transaction , there are 2 things . . . The Process . . . and the product (outcome). Those folks we serve expect and deserve a smooth process and mission accomplishment in terms of getting what we need and/or want in exchange for compensation.

It follows on, then, that the PROCESS is a critical component of our business.

Over time, one of our most important business functions is creating a process, tweaking it every day (To adjust for more efficiency or shifts in response to dynamic market conditions), communicating the steps of the process to our customers/clients in a systematic way, and delivering this great service consistently the same way every time.

Your process should serve EVERYONE including YOU! It must include clear boundaries to preserve time for self – Pauses to shift mental gears – time for cleaning up messes – defined modes of communication.

The better defined our systems become, the easier every transaction will be.

Interestingly, there will always be some potential customers/clients who don’t like our process and want to demand us to abandon our process and play by THEIR rules . . . Communicating our process early in the relationship susses these folks out , and we can mutually agree that we might not be a good fit for each other.

Wouldn’t you MUCH rather nip this at the bud early than endure a transaction rife with distraction and conflict?

So . . . What’s your process!

Think daily about how you can improve and communicate this process.

Live a happier life!

I Did NOT Want to do this today!

I did it anyway!

My morning routine is a non-negotiable.

It MUST be this way because I know that, on those days I fail to do it ALL, finding FLOW for the remainder of the day will be a futile pursuit.

The cost of cheating is immeasurable in terms of lost opportunity, self-degradation, and the DANGER that playing hooky once will reprogram my brain into thinking that it’s OK to skip all or part of this critical morning discipline of spooling myself up Spiritually, Mentally, Physically . . . Once I’ve compromised this standard I’ve set for myself, I know that the next time I don’t feel like doing it, I’ll find it much easier to skip . . . because, after all, that first time I skipped, I didn’t feel like I lost any progress.

This is a fool’s rationalization.

The natural inclination of the brain is to take the path of least resistance when allowed by the DRIVEN command and control center.

The instant we violate the sanctity of important healthy habits, our brain shifts into “re-wire” mode.

“AHA! Barry didn’t do the whole workout today, so let’s make that the new habit.”

Next thing ya know, you’re out of rhythm and the kaka starts hitting the fan.


Being truthful to myself and others is my 3rd guiding principle.

I wrote this post because I didn’t want to do my exercise routine this morning, and I caught myself attempting to justify a skip.

As I was arguing with myself, it dawned on me that ALL of the “justifications” were untruthful.

I then even considering the rationalization that if I were to tell the truth by saying: “I just don’t feel like doing it today!” . . . somehow that would let me off the hook.

It was then that I realized I was toast because THAT would then violate my 1st guiding principle: “Show up and be present.”

So . . . With great fanfare, I am pleased to report that I completed my entire exercise routine just prior to writing this post.

Don’t cheat!

PS . . . Another self lesson in today’s BarrysDriveTime.com – If you start . . . FINISH!

The Best Leaders – Always Present and Invisible

Yesterday, the leadership of Greater Nashville REALTORS orchestrated a fantastic day of learning and colleagueship (fellowship) for our members.

Traditionally, this association has been on a rhythm of quarterly “Membership Luncheons” at Nashville Music City Center (Our prized Convention Center in the Heart of the City). These luncheons were just that – Lunch – With a “key-note speaker” . . . The whole thing was @ an hour and a half, and had limited possibilities for attendees to interact with each other.

YESTERDAY was #NASHONOMICS! (Google that hashtag for comments and photos) . . . WOW! 4 great “Panels of Experts” AND a Lunch Keynote Presentation by the National Association of REALTORS Chief Economist Lawrence Yun. The sessions were:

  • A look at Greater Nashville’s infrastructure, workforce, and economic development pipeline
  • Affordable Housing and the effect on economic development
  • How to tell valuable stories with data that builds your business
  • Navigating downtown Nashville Commercial real estate

For sure, this Quarterly meeting was not like the others in so many ways. It was totally about informing our local REALTORS in ALL facets of the Middle Tennessee economy.

This meeting was a true gift to our membership in SO many ways . . . Here are a few of my take-aways:

  • The Leadership was largely invisible excepting 4 – The President for the Opening and Closing, and 3 who facilitated the panels.
  • The format was such that the membership had the ability to mingle and connect with each other and were able to directly interact with the panelists (Nice Flow).
  • The information shared was candid, timely, relevant, and IMPORTANT.
  • More members showed up than any others I’ve attended (I think a record of @ 650 of 5,000 Members)

There seemed to be common theme that wasn’t the stated theme.

In all of the sessions, I picked up on some frustration that the panelists were dancing around but not named . . . until the final session. There was this pervasive undertone that “Nashville’s Leadership” was hindering – not helping the growth and development of Nashville.

“We need enlightened leadership”

“We need forward thinking Leaders”

“Nashville has a “Crisis of Leadership”

Incidentally . . . I was not aware of ANY of the Political “Leaders” in attendance (I don’t know if they were invited).

People are baffled by the failed Transit plan and the lack of any evidence that a revised plan is in the works.

The City Leaders are “obstructing” healthy growth.

It’s not clear what direction this city is heading – “Bourbon Street – or “Business District”

How do we resolve the simple fact that there are more jobs than “workers” in many essential industries (Hospitality, Construction, Hospital, & etc.)

What of the MNPS Metro Nashville Public School System which is (and has always been) experiencing a crisis of leadership?

Oh! There’s more . . . but I can’t devote this whole morning to this blog post.

Essentially, the “Private Sector” is driving the growth of Nashville and consider the politicians to be obstructionists.

This is a classic example of “Leaders” who are deaf and blind to their constituents while the real work progresses despite their ineptitude. We all just want them to get out of the way, and let us take the wheel.

Interesting times, ain’t it?

Final thought . . . I’m thinking the “Leaders of Nashville” think they are “in control . . . They’re egregiously wrong . . . and they’ve never been in control . . . delusions of grandeur!

There now . . . I said it out loud!

and I say more in this morning’s BarrysDriveTime.com

You’ve heard about this, but did you listen?

We all have a bajillion new concepts and ideas popping into out field of experience daily.

Just think of all of the information that hits us in any given day. We’re surrounded by prolific digital information via Google, Facebook, Email, Videos, Podcasts . . . not to mention the never ending intrusion of information and ideas from the people around us who are equally bombarded and feel compelled to tell us all about these cool things, they’ve heard about by the prolific digital information via Google, Facebook, Email, Videos, Podcasts . . . not to mention the never ending intrusion of information and ideas the people around them who are equally bombarded and feel compelled to tell us all about these cools things, they’ve heard about – and so on – and so on – and so on.

It’s not surprising to me that most people are lucky to have the attention span of a gnat.

It’s also not surprising that most people fail to gain a full understanding of any new concept that shows up while our attention is passing through.

Instead of knowledge, we’re archiving bytes that arm us with words that impress others.

The fact that we can “google” just about anything we don’t understand in a nano-second doesn’t help much because we usually forget what it was we were looking for before we complete the query.

This has taught us NOT to pay attention when we hear words that we’ve heard before even if we don’t understand their meaning.

This is our RAS (Reticular Activating System) . . . an information sorting part of our brains. The RAS programs our brains . . . It’s VERY powerful. When you buy a new car, you start seeing LOTS of cars just like the one you bought (Even the same COLOR) because the RAS is filtering out all of the cars that aren’t like your new car.

This is a fun happening, but the RAS can also be self-limiting.

How many words or thoughts do you s’pose are programmed into your mind that might instill fear, or insecurity, or dread, or counter-productivity?

The RAS does not differentiate “Healthy” from “Destructive/Harmful” . . . It only knows the data – the words and images. When the RAS ‘s program detects that you are fearful, it does the only thing it knows to do . . . If filters out all thoughts that are not that fear . . . resulting in drawing you into the fear rather than giving you the tools to find safety.

What we focus on expands because of the RAS.

When we focus on the bad things that could/might happen – They do!

When we focus on the GOOD things that could/might happen – They DO!

Pay attention to what’s going into you head because it matters.

Be grateful!

Be nice!

Be humble!

Be kind!

Be generous!

Believe in abundance!

What goes in . . . comes out!