Remarkable Food, Information, & Comraderie 11/10

Good morning!

Inviting you to Pareto Realty’s 3rd “Lunch and Learn”. We offer these events mostly on Wednesdays and invite Real Estate Professionals from all over Middle TN regardless of their company affiliation (These events are NOT about Pareto). Be sure RSVP because the seating is limited to 30.

These events are ALWAYS free – We charge vendors with the task of “Educating & Feeding” the folks who show up . . . followed by time for Q&A and networking.

Next Wednesday 11/10/2010, Home Inspector and Chef Bill Carlson will be our “Spotlight Vendor”. @ Burton Hills Clubhouse

While you may want to come to this event just for the FOOD . . .

Chicken and Andouille gumbo w/rice; french bread and salad from creole Chef Bill who formerly worked at Commander’s Palace and the Monteleone Hotel in New Orleans.

You will also gain knowledge from Bill’s vast experience as a Chef and Home Inspector. Bill will discuss three topics:

1. Breast Cancer Reconstruction: Perforator flap surgery the best kept secret. The best option for reconstructive surgery most often not even mentioned by cancer recovery teams.

2. How to make a proper Roux; the main flavor ingredient to todays Gumbo and a key to creole/Cajun cooking.

3. Corner the Inspector Q and A. Bring in you questions from home and we will try and solve them . . . as well as any home inspection issues.

WE hope you will join us and guarantee it’ll be worth your time.

Don’t forget to RSVP ASAP!

Future Lunch and Learns:

11/18 – Thursday – Gavin Gossett With People’s Home Equity brings a panel of FHA Appraisers to talk about appraisal issues of our times – and Q& A

12/1 – WEdnesday – Emily Daniel with HOA Warranty and Donna Rumpler with Starkey Mortgage – Listing Advantage Program.
Saves your seller money and help them sell their home first over the competition. Three programs your seller can select from at no cost.

12/8 Brian Pitts With People’s Home Equity and Bo Hussung

12/15 Tentatively William Cochran with The Inn at Evins Mill

Let me know if you have a great Vendor, you would like to host one of these events.

Let’s get our momentum ROLLING through the winter – We’ll do that best by leveraging each other 🙂

Hoping to see you on Wednesday.



Monday Morning Coffee – Trick or Treat Strategy

Good Monday Morning!

Did you trick or treat last night?

There was some public controversy this year centered around this preposterous notion that trick or treating should happen on SATURDAY the 30th rather than Sunday the 31st because Sunday is a School night.

The purists were OFFENDED. How could the “officials” make such a horrid decision? First “they” change the date for daylight savings times . . . then this?


I researched HALLOWEEN (Click the link for the rest of the story) and discovered that the 31st date is a “secular date” for All Hallows Eve . . . and that Halloween coincides closely with the celebration of All Saints Day which used to be in April (100’s of years ago) but was moved to be on the SUNDAY closest to November 1st – thereby making All Saints Eve (Halloween) the day before . . . so I could argue either side of the coin very effectively.

That’s the kind of confusion you get when you mix up secular and Religious and Pagan holidays . . . Secular wins in the USA because it’s easier . . . so . . . the 31st it shall be (unless it happens to fall on a Sunday).

Some folks say the marketers were behind this effort to create TWO nights of trick or treating . . . that this whole controversy was engineered to sell more candy.

Well, a good trick or treating strategist might game this system by knocking doors on BOTH nights. Some neighborhoods stayed with the 31st . . . others favored the 30th . . . it would only require a little research and networking to have 2 great nights of candy gathering . . . and the marketers get their payday . . . twice as much candy doled out . . . and maybe twice as much face paint etc.

There are other strategies to consider if you’re a trick or treater looking for the optimal load of booty.

Define the best neighborhoods.

Start early and plan to go late,

Use a BIG bag . . . Oversized pillow case is perfect. Bring a folding Baby carriage to carry the “Reserve Bag” where you empty your pillow case when it gets too heavy.

Hit the fringes – the less dense areas – first because there’s more walking to do, and those folks tend to have more interesting candy (the big score this year was a 2 foot long pixie stick).

Then head for the dense areas and put your head down and charge forward to hit EVERY house . . . beware running into people you know and wasting too much time talking.


Go back to the fringes where they probably have a lot of candy left and are likely ready to off-load as much as possible so they won’t be eating it themselves the next few weeks.

 Oh yeah!

and the day after Halloween, head to the store and buy ALL of your decorations for next year . . . at 1/2 price.

Hope you had great fun this past weekend.

I’m just sayin’



Ever considered the notion that your perception might not match reality?

This morning, I sat down in front of the computer and asked my family what I should write about (as I sometimes do when my brain is vapor-locked).

My wife said: “Perception”

My 11 year daughter said: “Similes, metaphors, comparisons & contrasting” (I misspelled “Metaphores” and was instantly corrected “metaphors”) – YIKES!

I think I’ll go with the perception.

If a person journeys through life believing that she is always RIGHT . . . with conviction . . . that her perception is the ONLY perception . . . and that her mission in life to make believers of ALL of us in her perception . . . Then she is not inviting new knowledge and relationships.

Win-Win cannot happen.

How’s it feel when you run across one of those “It’s my way, or the highway” people?

Could you possibly be guilty of the same occasionally?

Everyone has their own perceptions about everything . . . It’s what you do with that perception that defines who you are and who you attract (or repel) in your life.

You cannot be open to new and interesting ideas and/or creative solutions if you charge through life forcing your perception on others. 

Perception is a personal filter.

The mind works best like a parachute . . . when it’s OPEN!

When communication flow breaks down in a negotiation or relationship, perhaps perception (yours) is the culprit . . . It may be time to eat some crow and consider your personal agenda.

Our perception often tricks us into thinking that we can create the script (agenda) for everything we encounter. The problem comes when other people don’t know their lines and/or have created agendas of their own.


Steven Covey was the first person I ever heard say: “Seek to UNDERSTAND!”

What is it that we are seeking to understand?


So . . . we honor each other by accepting other’s perceptions without judgment. We sometimes need to “agree to disagree”. We seek to understand each other rather than to hammer our ideas into others’ heads.

Keep all of this in proper perspective, and the right people tend to show up in our lives . . . the right things happen . . . and we enjoy less stress and anxiety.

As I wrap this post up, my daughter commented that she has had this conversation at school in the class-room . . . Hmmm . . . we just keep on needing to learn and relearn this stuff, eh? 

We adults probably should consider “refresher courses” on social effectiveness as we do our bidding.

I’m just sayin’



“Don’t spend money you don’t have!” (and other Fatherly advice)

Doesn’t it drive you crazy when you get yourself into a pickle and you hear:

“I told you so!” ?

“If only you had LISTENED to me . . . ”

My paternal instincts come forth often as I coach and consult with Professionals who are always doing the best they know to do with the resources they have, and sometimes wander astray of the fundamentals of sound life and business practices.

We are all responding to rapid complexity (My father calls this “raplexity”) in our every day lives. Life is coming at us FAST and we only really get ourselves into trouble when we REACT instead of RESPOND to the myriad transformations happening all around us.

The first instinct is to cast blame on MONEY . . .

“If only I had more money to throw at this problem, everything would be dandy!”

and so we fall into the trap of looking for ways to spend money we don’t have thereby incurring debt . . . or mail the bill payments out a few days before the closing is supposed to happen and then FREAK OUT when the closing does not happen per OUR plan.

Does the shoe fit?

If you don’t think this shoe fits you (ever), please check your pulse immediately.

It’s the times when we get off balance that we become more reactive and less responsive . . . and we tend to make impulsive (Irresponsible) decisions . . . My opinion is that this is EXACTLY what happened to our National Economy. Things got weird and all we could collectively think to do is blame it on money and throw more money at it.

Look where that’s gotten us in the last 3 years.

So – This stuff works on an individual (micro) as well as a National scale (Macro).

We all hate to hear what we hate to hear – the TRUTH, and we all know that when the kakka hits the fan, we can always dig into our brain’s archives and find our own individual contributions to the malady . . . Each of us is playing a role in the whole.

BUT . . . Isn’t it more convenient to stick the head in the sand and “be invisible” until the storm passes?

Each of us lives in a world of CHOICE . . . as I saw in a recent post “It’s not about what we chose as much as it is about what we CHOOSE NOW!

So . . . Some Fatherly advice  for those who accept personal responsibility for their role in where they are right NOW in their lives.

It’s time to “Saddle up”!

You KNOW what to do . . . now, go DO IT!

YOU got yourself into this mess and YOU are the ONLY one who can get yourself out of this mess.

When you’re following your true passion, these obstacles are speed bumps (not road blocks)

Take responsibility without blame or judgement

Don’t count your chickens before they hatch.

Don’t put ALL of your eggs in one basket!

Always keep an eye open for new opportunities!

Luck appears at the intersection of preparation/practice and Opportunity.


Re-invent yourself at least every 2 1/2 years.

Whose dream are you living? Yours? Someone else’s?

Don’t be a Jack of all trades and Master of None – Specialize and BE the expert.



Invite others to participate in your life – If they show up, they’re the right people for now.

Be who you are.

Be a squirrel . . . Store plenty of nuts for later.

Always take the high road!

Do unto others as you would them do unto you.

Love and respect your Mother and Father!

Surround yourself with people you admire.

Believe in yourself as the CEO of your life.

If at any time you find yourself in a place where you are neither giving nor receiving anything of value, take responsibility for your life experience and use your 2 feet to take you to a place where you can contribute and receive. (The Law of 2 Feet – Open Space technology)

On taking care of yourself: “If your body dies, where will you live?”

“We are Spiritual Beings having a human experience” (Gary Keller)

Life’s too short to  . . .

Resentment will kill ya faster than ANYTHING!

Getcha head in the game!

Hmmm . . . I could keep on typing for another hour.


You are nothing short of REMARKABLE as a human being, and you’ve only got this life to show the rest of us what you are capable of doing in ALL of your glory.

Stoke that fire in your belly . . . and let’s get busy doing some great stuff.

I’m inviting you “IN” to you own life purpose.

Are you “IN”?

I’m just sayin’



Business gets a LOT easier when . . .


I’ve heard a LOT of frustration out there with pesky little details like uncertainty of the process and/or rules . . . Unpredictability of the flow of transactions through the lending process . . . Lack of communication throughout the process ostensibly because there’s nothing to report.

Crazy times . . .

When things like this occur, the WORST thing a professional can do is hide. Sticking the head in the sand doesn’t make the problem go away or mend itself.

So . . .

How about considering the unfathomable solution of INCREASING the level of contact with MORE people such that creative solutions have the potential for emerging?

The worst thing that could happen is that you make some new friends and acquaintances.

There’s something I know about REALTORS and Lenders (and most other professionals) . . . If you put them in a room together without much of an agenda, they’ll quickly find themselves in deep conversations with others in the room . . . thereby creating their own mutual agendas and relationships will build and problems will be solved.

We are all “subjects” in this great “social experiment” known as the “human experience”, and what I know from my little sliver of experience is that we are innately social animals . . . we are more gregarious . . . we crave camaraderie . . . we love being a part of something meaningful . . . We’d rather be “IN” than “OUT”!


Because it is during those times we are “IN” the mix when we seem to get the most out of our life experience as we learn vicariously through others.

Most weeks, Pareto Realty coordinates “Lunch & Learn” events – mostly on Wednesdays – We invite vendors (Lenders, Home Inspectors, Restaurants, Local Businesses) to come to “Educate and Feed” the folks who show up.

We typically have 7 (or more) real estate firms represented at each of these events as well as an interesting mix of other folks including other vendors. the vendor doing the “Educating and feeding” presents . . . and then opens the floor for any discussion that percolates from the presentation.

EVERYONE wins as new relationships form.

THAT’s the kinda stuff that’s going to lead this country out of this mess . . . not additional regulations or rules or laws.

Let’s just keep on looking for opportunities to gather together and learn from each other, eh?

I’m just sayin’