Quit bickering and DO something about it

This blog post could easily become a rant, but Imma not gonna let it be.

No matter who you are wherever you are doing whatever you’re doing, you have opinions about all this STUFF going on in the world.

My facebook feed is chock full of rants and turmoil over all of these HUGE issues over which we are grappling.

Friendships become strained because of strong opinions being aired . . . tensions run taught all around us.

I sense LOTS of frustration from so many people who are quick to comment that no one can say much of anything without being ATTACKED!

So often I hear myself (and others) issuing this plea: “SOMEONE should DO something about this!”

. . . and I agree . . . “Someone” SHOULD do something about this . . . Let’s start with YOU!

Yes! YOU can do something about this – even little ole you can have influence resulting in positive change all around you!

How to do this?

Invite others into a neutral, safe space for the single purpose of having a civil dialog with the sole purpose of understanding the differing positions.

From there, constructive work can commence.

This is NOT about changing others’ beliefs as much as it is about compelling all to shift their perspectives such that a cooperative Spirit can emerge (Phoenix Rising).

As you work your magic, all those folks in your “bubble” notice and marvel at the good work you’re doing bringing conflicted people together and helping them realize that the bickering and name calling and resistance are not useful . . . because that’s the nature of we beasts . . . the more we push our agendas on THEM, the more they push back.

A few things to consider . . . Identify ONE well defined issue for which YOU have great passion.

The juicier the issue, the better . . . Complexity, Diversity, Conflict – even CHAOS . . . Name it and issue an invitation to anyone and everyone in your sphere of influence.

The people who have passion for this issue will show up.

While there are myriad “methodologies” to facilitate this “summit”, you won’t need to be a trained facilitator to get a useful dialog going.

All you’re going to have to do is ask the question: “What about this issue is of the most importance to you?”

As those topics come out, make a list of those issues . . . Voila!

Your “agenda” is now set.

Lather – Rinse – Repeat

Here’s a nice firestarter for you!

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Posted in Consumer Blog, Life Rhythm Way, Pareto Realty, Real Estate Professionals

Deliver more than promised

Not everyone wants to be rich and famous!

In fact, most of those who want fame and fortune won’t get “there”.

This is a “Chicken or egg” scenario:

Which is it?

Do you achieve fame and fortune because that was your goal (to be rich & famous)?

OR . . .

Do you achieve fame and fortune because you’re the best at what you do?

Where’s your focus?

I’ve noticed that many of the most successful (Rich and Famous) people I know got to be that way because of the following:

  • Authenticity – Following heart with goals in alignment with personal life purpose.
  • Tenacity – Being willing to do whatever it takes (Within Legal and Ethical parameters) to make each and every minute of every day, week, month, year to contribute to the cause . . . more and better than the day before.
  • Consistent and persistent, indefatigable pursuit with clear vision of the path.
  • Intentional relationships with people who support and challenge without judgement.
  • Being “teachable” – Expectation of SURPRISE – Knowing that things seldom pan out per the plan and having the gracious patience to learn along the way.
  • Deliver more and better than promised.
  • Being “remarkable” – Doing those things most others don’t . . . Simple things like returning the grocery cart to the stall AND taking a moment to straighten the others that were slung in there.
  • Don’t ask how you can serve others in their times of need . . . just do!
  • Listen!
  • Love!

Ooze with enthusiasm as you create your art.

Do all of this, and you WILL be “Rich & Famous” in ways that you never could have imagined.

Why the picture of my my Lawn Mower?

It looks darn near brand new, doesn’t it?

It’s 3rd birthday is this Spring, and this little work horse keeps Owen Hollow beautiful when the grass is growing. That’s no easy task because Owen Hollow is VERY hilly which makes it especially hard on the tranny and motor and blades, but that’s OK BECAUSE:

My friend Tom from Tri-Green Equipment in Hendersonville, TN  comes and fetches her every year between Thanksgiving and New Year and takes it back to the shop where they tune it up, change oil and filters, sharpens blades, and lots more . . . and when she comes back home, she looks THIS pretty every year.

For me, it’s like getting a brand new mower every January . . . ready to perform as soon as the grass starts growing.

From my perspective, the most Rich and famous Lawn Equipment Company on the planet is Tri-Green.

So . . . how are YOU Rich and Famous?

Who’s talking about you, and what are they saying?

Just keep on delivering more than you promise!

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Posted in Consumer Blog, Life Rhythm Way, Pareto Realty, Real Estate Professionals

I don’t have the time to write this blog post about Southwest Air

BUT . . . I’m going to do it because they’ve failed to do the thing that has made me a raving fan of theirs.

Southwest Air has ALWAYS been (in my mind) a superb company with fair fares, great customer service, on-timeliness, and doing the right things when go wrong.

They failed on all accounts this week when I accompanied my daughter along with her service dog (Golden Doodle) to the ticket counter. My daughter has flown with this service dog other times with no issues, but THIS time, the Ticket agent stalled . . . She told us that because the flight was “full” the service animal could not fly unless we were to buy a 2nd seat.

I asked:  “If the flight is full, how can you sell a 2nd seat?”

She responded that on all “full” flights, they always have 2 extra seats . . . and those extra seats go to Stand-by passengers if not otherwise taken.

She then went to the back and returned with her “Supervisor” who was all about proving that they were right and we were wrong . . . That this large dog could not fly without purchasing the 2nd seat – even to the extent of looking up the regulation (which changed in September 2018).

We made this reservation over a month ago and daughter called them and gave them all of the information about the dog . . . So . . . They knew that the dog was coming AND what Kind of (and size) dog he is.

During this whole scenario, my daughter was getting more and more agitated – shaking – scared . . . After all, her NEED is to have this dog with her as prescribed by a Doctor.

Not only did Southwest Air employees at the Ticket counter grossly mishandle this scenario, but then proceeded to sweep the whole thing under the rug expecting it to go away. This scenario was unconscionable . . . These ladies behind the ticket counter didn’t care . . . no empathy or compassion . . . stone cold . . . and they demonstrated this by dragging things out  – 15 minutes of playing around with the computer (Couldn’t figure out how charge for the 2nd seat) . . . and the boarding time was getting close – 15 minutes to get through security and to the gait.

As of the writing of this post, I have discovered that Facebook has deleted my initial post to Southwest Air which tells me that Southwest Air flagged it and had it taken down . . . which further irritates me.

Why would they not address the issue  head on with me?

Instead, they choose to engage with me and send me the voluminous “placation” Direct message with no further follow-up. Below is my exchange with “Grayson” on Direct Messenger.

Wednesday 1/2/2019 6:18 PM

I originally posted this story on my personal Facebook feed and tagged Southwest Airlines . . . Within minutes, I received a comment from Southwest Airlines asking me to send the details of the flight to them via Direct Messenger.

Below is the exchange that ensued:

“Thanks for following up, Barry. I’m truly sorry for the frustration and stress that was caused today. Would you mind explaining a little bit more about what happened? Is Curley a large Service Animal? -Grayson”

Me: “This is reference the facebook post I sent regarding my Daughter’s flight to college. She has high anxiety and is in the care of a Doctor who prescribed a Service Dog for “Compression Therapy” in the event she has an issue. We did all the things we’ve done in the past – Notified SWA that she would have a large Golden Doodle with her. Thank God I walked in with her to check baggage – the 2 ladies behind the desk said that there is a new ADA reg that applies, and that she could only have the dog on the flight if we pay for an additional seat “because the flight was full” – They were so busy looking up the “Proof” of the law change, they had no compassion whatsoever. If I had not been there, she would have had a meltdown because they were requiring buying another seat, and SHE did not have the money to buy another seat . . . I paid for an additional seat, and then they took another 10+ minutes trying to figure out how to do this in the computer system. Finally, one of the ladies said she would print the boarding passes and hopefully get it right by the time she got to the gate. I know she got on the plane, but it left the gate an hour late and is not landed yet, so I don’t know anything else. I felt “bait and switch” She has flown without issues with this dog. I’m a business owner, and I know that policies change, but you cannot penalize retroactively on folks who bought tickets before the policy took affect. The worst part of the whole thing for me is this is the first time I’ve flown SouthWest and felt the employees didn’t care. No one likes surprises when travelling, and this was a BIG surprise.”

Grayson: “I appreciate those details, Barry. There was a change to our policy in September 2018 which was communicated on http://Southwest.com. As it pertains to (This) situation if our Agents feel that a Service Animal is unable to be accommodated in the space of a single seat the Passenger may be required to purchase an additional ticket. Although Flight #()_ was nearly booked to capacity not only ensures that Curley would have enough room, but allows us to adequately plan for the number of seats that will be occupied on the aircraft.

Nevertheless, I recognize that the handling of the situation as a whole left much to be desired. Customer perception is very important to Southwest, and we expect our Employees to deliver topnotch Customer Service at all times. We hire folks who exhibit Servant’s Hearts, Warrior Spirits, and Fun-LUVing Attitudes—people who we trust to make a great impression on our Customers. We believe our Employees play an integral role in our Company’s success, and it is up to them to set our airline apart from the competition. I apologize that we left you with less than stellar memories on this occasion. Please know that I have relayed the details of (your) experience to our Senior Leaders for internal review.

We try our best to always provide pleasant travel experiences, and we are sorry that this last trip was anything but that. We would certainly enjoy another opportunity to serve (her) and Curley under far more favorable circumstances. -Grayson

My response: “Thank you! Perhaps a tweak in protocol when there are service animals registered and the occupancy hits 85% a message goes to those people as a warning. At least it wouldn’t hit them at the ticket counter. The current system seems to set everyone up for failure.”

Grayson: “That’s a great suggestion, Barry! I’ll be sure to pass that on as well. We want our Customers to be prepared and informed when they travel with us, and I appreciate your feedback, so we can improve in that manner. -Grayson”

That conversation was Wednesday Jan 2, 2019 . . . as of this writing, I’ve had no other communications from Southwest Airlines.

I can tolerate a certain level of being under-served because it’s all too common, but adding indifference to it is infuriating.

After all . . . There must be other airlines who care and fly where I want to fly.

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Posted in Consumer Blog, Life Rhythm Way, Pareto Realty, Real Estate Professionals

10X performers – Rare, misunderstood, and oft dismissed as freaks

Those 1%ers are freaks of Nature!

They’re just like us other humans but have exceptional timing and LUCK!


That’s it!

They’re not smarter or better or harder working . . .

Their success happens because of their uncanny ability to magically be in all the right places with all the right people at the right times for an effortless confluence of mystical performance.

These folks are SuperHuman!

There’s no point in putting the energy, time, and money into attempting to replicate their success, because we cannot be they.

BUT . . . We CAN learn from them and tweak our habits and routines and associations and work ethics and ingenuity and resolve to make a difference while here on Planet Earth.

So . . . Let’s quit worrying about how “they” were so LUCKY to make it to the top, and decide, instead, to learn whatever we can learn from them and implement the bits and pieces that we glean into our individual way of being and doing.

This isn’t about “being like them” because we cannot be that person.

Perhaps, we can serve ourselves well by being open to the idea of “unlearning” some components of our “worldview”.

For some, their worldview is defined as: “I could never be that successful!”

These people are correct!

As long as that’s their self-definition, they will stay right there in their state of complacency or misery.

I’m interest in feeding a different beast.

This is the beast of possibilities.

When we focus more on possibilities, we focus less on other peoples’ status and achievements.

We cease this debilitating dis-ease of comparing ourselves to others, and we adopt a mindset of:

“I am now ready to the best ME imaginable.”

First, here’s something you have to unlearn . . . the notion that it matters what other people think about you.


I think not!

Freeing/Liberating and creating conditions for your own, personal version of success.

Caveat: As you claim and own this new commitment to be a better you, some people in your world may do their best to sabotage your efforts because they see (and may feel threatened by) the changing of you . . . They don’t want you to go!

You’ll know soon if they’re good friends because they’ll either accept the “new you” as you morph and stay with you, or they will drift away.

Don’t worry about that . . . the right people will start showing up at all the right times and the right things will start happening.

These are my wishes for you in 2019.

My Mentor Seth Godin (who doesn’t know he is my Mentor) gave us all tremendous gift this morning with his post today.

I read Seth’s post AFTER Facebook Live-ing my drive time video this morning (See below) . . . Synchronicity!

“The 10x lesson

The 10x programmer, the 10x strategy expert, the 10x surgeon.

This is something we are always in search of. The human who is playing at a different level, generating work that changes everything.

The thing is: a 1x contributor can’t become a 10x merely by working ten times as hard. The physics of time won’t allow it, certainly, but it’s also because 10x doesn’t work on the same axis. It’s not about more effort. It’s about more insight.

In order to make that forward leap, you need to trust yourself. To create space. To have the discipline to say no to distractions or even to projects that put you back into the 1x mode.

The reason that there are so few 10x contributors isn’t that we lack innate talent. It’s that our systems and our self-talk seduce us into believing that repeating 1x work to exhaustion is a safer path.”


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Posted in Consumer Blog, Life Rhythm Way, Pareto Realty, Real Estate Professionals

Deciding that insanity is not the best option

Doing the same thing and expecting different results creates perfect conditions for a classic case of insanity.

This is the time of year when many of us are reviewing our performance in 2018.

This time last year, what were your goals for 2018?

How did you arrive at those goals?

Were those goals wishes or commitments?

There’s a HUGE difference between “I want to do . . . ” and “I WILL do . . . ”

Those who grab their goals with aspirational wants dive into the new year with rigor and enthusiasm until – well – they settle back into those comfortable ways which got them through the year at which point they develop amnesia about the new goals for the year . . . resulting in having the same year over again and again and again.

The crazy part about this is that these are the folks who say: “Setting goals doesn’t work!”

I have a recommendation that might just break this cycle of insanity.

When you set your goals for 2019, think them through enough that they pass the “SMART goal test”.






Do this “exercise” with a few (or many) of your peers/colleagues and pledge all to each other to hold others accountable to doing whatever it might take to achieve these goals.

Commit to a weekly accountability meeting (In person, on telephone, or Video) – Every Monday morning.

Focus on strategies for growth and stability by developing relationships with the right people . . . creating systems around repetitive tasks, and investing in appropriate tools to leverage your time, energy, and money.

As your right “leverage” (People, Systems, Tools) evolve, you’ll gradually feel less pressure . . . You’ll begin to enjoy more results with less effort . . . Likely, you’ll find yourself with more free time.

So . . . what could you do with more free time?

I have an idea . . . Use some of that free time to “sharpen your saw” (Education, reading) and use the remainder doing human to human LEAD GENERATION.

After all . . . realization of your goals relies mostly on having enough of the right leads  to fuel the machine you’ve created.

. . . and so goes the cycle of  Goals – Accountability – Leverage – Lead Generation.

Simple – YES?

Go forth and prosper!


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Posted in Consumer Blog, Life Rhythm Way, Pareto Realty, Real Estate Professionals

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