With a little help

When we’re feeling down-trodden and out of sorts, we often find rejuvenating energy from the most unexpected sources.

Of course we’re surprised because we are not expecting help. We are proud and strong and even “invincible” . . . so we weather the storm and do our best to keep our chins up and muddle through.

We all have these “seasons” in our lives. We don’t want to “trouble” anyone else with our problems. After all, we got ourselves into this mess, so it’s up to us to get ourselves out of it, right?

This is where “random acts of kindness” come from. A friend senses that something is awry and lends a hand. Even if it’s just a small gesture – a minor inconvenience, it’s a HUGE gift to the recipient. It might even be a veritable life-saver.

Turtles understand!

Sometimes, it’s worse than “down-trodden” . . . It’s crisis or tragedy. These are the times when we’re blind-sided and yearn for help but don’t have the energy to ask for it. I’m a believer that each and every one of us has the potential within to provide appropriate support as a bridge to the “other side” of this scenario even as we cannot see the way. While we all have that potential, each and every one of us has our own set of “life comes at you first” scenarios, so we may or may not have the “energy reserve” to take on this role of bridge support. This is difficult and exhausting “work” which those of us who have great passion for serving others (REALTORS?) . . . We want to save the planet!

Here’s my plea for you . . . Take care of yourself FIRST and watch your energy levels lest you go down with the ship.

This post comes from my reading of The Go-Giver last night. Such a powerful book about generosity and abundance. It occurred to me that we often take on too much of the heavy lifting to “help” people in need, when a simple gift gesture may be enough for that person to bail herself out thereby emboldening her dignity and resilience.

AND – While reading the book, I kept thinking about this powerful Book/movie The Green Mile

Thank you for your continued generosity of Spirit!

Great question – Here’s my answer to a different question

Clearly, the digital world has damaged many peoples’ ability to engage in useful dialog.

This morning, I came to the conclusion that 80% of the comments in any given thread are not “dialog” . . . they are a collage of ego driven monologues. (on my 3rd reading of this comment, I almost deleted it under the heading of “cynical” – Jaded, and then realized it is totally appropriate).

My observation of several Facebook Groups and a couple of email list-serves, confirms this suspicion. It’s truly a rarity that the comments of the thread directly address the question posed.

This is not due to lack of intelligence because IMHO (in my humble opinion), the members of these on-line communities are brilliant experts and quintessential professionals.

If it’s so true that these folks are “Grande Masters” of their form of art, how can they be so off-target so often in these forums?

  • Ego . . . Are these folks so egotistical they only participate to grandstand their amazing wealth of knowledge . . . Legends in their own minds? Every question is an opportunity to demonstrate their superior status in the field.
  • Distraction . . . They read the question while their brains were off somewhere else, so they respond with complete nonsensical gibberish.
  • Space Invaders . . . AKA “Trolls” are intentional trouble-makers, disrupters, rabble rousers looking for a fight.
  • Confused – Filtered . . . Maybe they were struggling with a similar question (but not the same as the one posed) so they answered their own question instead.
  • Inattention – These folks might just be bored and mindlessly scanning their feeds, see your question, and don’t read it to understand . . . only to respond (even if totally off-target)

For sure, there are other reasons not the least of which is the brutal truth that digital communication is single dimensional and way too easy for folks to hide their true self and broadcast their “plastic” public self.

In the digital world we CAN be larger than life . . . without all of that responsibility to pay attention.

Show up – Be present – Tell the truth – Let it go


The best reason to show up at more meetings.

We all have more than our fair shares of invitations to meetings. Some meetings are more “relevant and important” than others. Before committing to attend, most folks want to know WIIFM (What’s in it for me?). At a minimum, We want to know the topic/theme . . . even better if we can know who else is coming.

I’m a serial “inviter” . . . Maybe I think too much, but I frequently think of current issues and opportunities and feel compelled to start conversations about them with people who care . . . so I issue invitations to anyone and everyone within sight. I know that whoever comes will be the right people because they care enough to show up.

It occurred to me that not everyone is choosing to show up for the right reasons . . . It may not be all about the topic . . . It could be:

  • You are coming because other people you know, like, and trust are attending
  • You want to be seen amongst this group of people
  • Then there’s THIS . . . You decide to attend because of the potential for “meetings after the meeting”

Any time any group of people gathers, this potential for meetings after the meeting exists.When humans connect – engage with each other, it’s always a veritable smorgasbord (Marketplace) of ideation. Of course, we all came this meeting to explore THIS topic, so there’s not time to explore other topics, so the group self-organizes to meet elsewhere at another time. Often, this manifests with a simple: “Let’s have lunch together to talk about this!”

If you’re the inviter and you want to optimize your event, consider a registration process that includes listing who’s registered . . . even better, do it in a place where there’s ample space for participants to linger after the meeting (Hotel Lobby).

Below is a story I posted on Facebook about my little slice of Heaven AKA #owenhollow

A few weeks ago, I scheduled my annual “Owen Hollow Spring Cookout” to be this Saturday 5/18. I invite everyone I know . . . and some people I don’t know . . . like ALL of the neighbors. This will be 2nd Annual. I mailed invitations to all the neighbors and learned yesterday that it was well received.

“Yesterday, I came home to #owenhollow 30 minutes earlier than usual. When I turned on Waller Road, I saw neighbor Rick in his car talking to neighbor Rickie. I’ve lived here 3 years and have waved to Rickie 1000+ times, but we have never talked – until yesterday. Rick told me he was coming to the cookout and then drove away. Rickie and I had an awesome conversation – He welcomed me as “Family” in our very special place (Waller Road). He said that all of the neighbors were so happy to have me in the hollow – Betty says she can set her clock by my comings and goings – 6 AM and 5 PM – Rickie assured me that we would all keep our neighborhood safe. He also told me that all of my neighbors had been sneaking up to Owen Hollow when I was at work for the past 3 years . . . watching my progress and thanking me for doing such a fine job cleaning it up. I knew this was a very special place the first time I saw it and feel SO lucky to call this my home, especially now that I’ve been claimed as “family” – Thankful!”

“C” words that make a difference

Collaborate – Change – Create – Cause – Commiserate – Camaraderie – Champion – Compensation – Care – Core – Closure – Complete – Compete – Contact – Cacophony – Calm – Can – candor – capable – Cantankerous – Capitulate – Capricious – Captivating – career – carefree – careful – carry – cash – catalyst – cathartic – Caution – Celebrate – Central – Circle – Challenge – Certainty – Ceremony – Chance – Chaos – Charisma – Charity – Chasm – Cheerful – Cherish – Chill – Choice – Chord – Chutzpah – Civility – Claim – Clarity – Clever – Climax – Coach – Coalesce – Cogitate – Cohabit – Cohere – Coincide – Comfort – Comical – Commemorate – Commence – Commit – Companion – Compass – Compassion – Compatible – Compel – Compose – Compliment – Complexity – Complete – Complement – Comprehend – Concentrate – Concise – Concur – Conclude – Conducive – Condolence – Confidant – Confidence – Confirm – Congruous – Conjure – Connect – Conscientious – Consensus – Considerate – Console – Contact – Consult – Contemplate – Content – Contribute – Continue – Contribute – Contrive – Convene – Converge – Converse – Convey – Cool – Cooperate – Coordinate – Cordial – Correlation – Correspond – Corroborate – Cosmic – Counsel – Courage – Courteous – Courtesy – Creative – Credibility – Cultivate – Cure – Curate – Curiosity – Cute

That letter “C” sure wields a confluence of some constructive wisdom

Non-attachment is enigmatic and important

Did you ever have one of those days that, out of the blue, there’s this recurring theme that shows up all around you?

This morning , I woke up thinking about “When things aren’t happening according to the plan”, so I talked about that in my Barrysdrivetime.com (Embedded below).

When I got to the office, I had a great workout and launched into my Monday morning Routine which includes a very intense “Plan & Calendar” session . . . This weekly 30 planning session is essential . . . important and even CRITICAL to set myself and my business up for a successful day/week/month/year/life . . .

Unh-huh . . . Thinking about non-attachment while orchestrating a “high level planning session” with myself developing a plan that’s almost certainly not going to happen as expected 🙂

Who am I fooling, eh?

My final order of business before writing my daily blog post is to check my email – Just a glance – to get a read on any burning fires so I can put them “in the hopper of my mind” to help prioritize my actions.

The first email I opened said: “Dreams come true, Barry, that’s what they do. The only variable is when.
For the slow approach: Resist. Attach. Insist. Deny. Stop. Second guess. Whine. Argue. Defend. Protest. Cry. Struggle. And ask others, when you know the answer yourself. 
For the quick approach: Visualize. Pretend. Prepare. Dodge. Roll. Serpentine. Do not waver over intentions, but over methods. Show up, even when nothing happens. And give thanks in advance. 
You knew that,   The Universe”

Chills . . . Right ON TARGET!

When we are attached to rigid outcomes, we are vulnerable to the “slow approach”

“The quick approach” invites us to play the game fully with only one expectation . . . the expectation that we will be surprised by the outcome.

Ain’t life juicy when let let it be?